My Last Week in Buenos Aires

It's my last week in Buenos Aires before I go back to the UK and Ireland for Christmas and every day and night is packed with press lunches, end-of-year drinks and dinners, so it's all go.

Monday night I have more British friends visiting - a guy I worked with in Brazil back in 2004 and his friend, so I rope in Steel Drama Queen and a couple of her other friends (English and American) and we head to Miranda, which never fails to impress.

We start with a provoleta - my new favourite thing - and it goes down very well with my friends. I've had enough steaks in the last week to last me a lifetime so I go for my usual mouthwatering chicken Ensalada Jacinta, while my pals go for steak, lamb and one lot of pasta. We're all suitably stuffed and my buddies head down the street for an ice-cream (how many other countries do you know that have ice-cream parlours open at midnight?) while I head to bed for a very early morning the next day.

Tuesday night it's a business dinner with an economist visiting from the U.S., and we go to Happening, an upmarket parrilla in Puerto Madero that's very popular for business lunches and dinners. The steak is absolutely perfect and I even struggle to eat mine, but the service is unbelievably bad. Our waiter keeps abandoning us for up to an hour at a time and our water and wine glasses are left empty for long periods. I try several times to catch a waiter's attention and fail. I realise they are understaffed but, unfortunately, there's little in the way of apology and it becomes a three-hour dinner - not what I was hoping for by 1am when I'm shattered from the previous night.

Fortunately, I've been to Happening before for a business lunch and the service was a million times better, so I won't judge it permanently based on Tuesday evening's performance. 

The economist has some very interesting chat and tells us he has a Havanna index - i.e. Argentine inflation based on the price of a box of alfajores each year. He says it's risen something like than 120% (I don't remember the exact figures) since a year ago. Insane. 

Wednesday I walk around to my colleague's house nearby in Palermo for a quiet evening of wine, cheese and ham. And champagne to celebrate the end of 2011, of course! I notice an interesting-looking Evita museum in his neighbourhood and vow to visit in the new year.

Now it's off back to England and Ireland for three weeks. I'll miss you and your scorching heat, Buenos Aires!

I'll leave you with this shot of a Christmas tree near the Bosques de Palermo taken on my final 8.5k-run home from work of 2011:

Cluny & La Cabrera

For my newly wed friends' last weekend in Buenos Aires, we book Cluny for Saturday night with another couple who are actually on their honeymoon (Me? Gooseberry? Never) and La Cabrera for a final Sunday-night parrilla.

Cluny, on El Salvador, right in the heart of Palermo Soho, is a very stylish, cool, sophisticated restaurant with a smart, dim-lit interior and we begin our evening with a pisco sour on the white leather sofas in the bar/reception area. The place has a nice, calm ambience and the staff are friendly, but we're disappointed to find it half-empty - on a Saturday night at 11pm. I can only put this down to the fact that it's quite pricey and there's an abundance of other places to eat in the same area, but that doesn't stop La Cabrera from being chock-full every single night.

Pic from Cluny's website

Cluny describes itself as French-inspired with a Mediterranean feel. I order the Patagonian lamb and the warm chocolate pie with melting centre and we enjoy a couple of bottles of wine. The food is good but just not spectacular and the place lets itself down a little on the ambience.

La Cabrera is a much better experience. We arrive a few minutes early, at opening time, and we actually have to wait outside with a crowd of other diners until it opens - the place is that popular. We are seated at a small round table tucked away in one corner and are immediately hit by the ambience - the place just has a busy, lively vibe to it. Within a short space of time, every single table is full and the waiters rush from one set of customers to another, hurriedly trying to serve everyone. The place just has bags of character and history. The walls are adorned with restaurant reviews and different artefacts and the ceiling is complete with chandeliers made of forks and spoons and plenty of other relics to keep a roving eye occupied.

We start off with a provoleta - a delicious, semi-hard provolone cheese, grilled with oregano and served in a round dish. It is mouthwateringly moreish and is easily consumed by the three of us, despite the fact that my friend's husband has a stomach bug and isn't planning to eat much. 

The steak at La Cabrera

The restaurant recommends the Ojo de Bife (Rib-eye steak) as its speciality so we go to order two 200g versions, but the waiter says we're better off with a 400g chunk to share, as the flavours will be better. He isn't wrong. It's one of the best steaks we've ever eaten - juicy, fatty in a good way, tender and nicely medium. The steak comes with a huge selection of accompaniments in tiny pots - olives, mushrooms, tomatoes, bits of salad, peppers and different salsas. Needless to say, my friend quickly gets over his 'food poisoning' and is happy to tuck into a bit of meat!

The dinner is nicely rounded off when our bill comes with a tree made out of Chupa Chups lollies to suck on the way home. 10/10 for La Cabrera - I'll be coming again.

The lollies that come with the bill at La Cabrera

A Lazy Palermo Monday

Today is a bank holiday in Argentina (Dia de la Soberanía Nacional) and my friends have gone off to a ranch in Mendoza, so I spend a lazy day wandering around Palermo Soho for a bit of Christmas shopping.

On the way to the shops, I stop for lunch at Club Serrano, a relaxed little lunch spot in Plaza Serrano/Plaza Cortázar where you can sit on the rooftop café/bar after 2pm. I order a very healthy caprese salad and freshly squeezed orange juice and watch the world go by from above before I head down into the throng. The waiter seems amused that I like to come here by myself and asks me a few questions about where I'm from, what I do etc. Always good to have a bit of banter when you're solo-dining...

Coffee, Havannet, magazine, biscuits and sunshine... bliss

One of my absolute favourite things about this country is Havanna, the coffee-shop-and-chocolatier chain that specialises in alfajores, a sandwich-biscuit a bit like a Wagon Wheel, filled with delicious, sickly-sweet dulce de leche. I have actually already eaten one too many alfajores though, and my new favourite treat is the Havannet - a dark chocolate, upside-down cone filled with dulce de leche with a biscuit bottom. A bit like a Walnut Whip, only filled with soft fudge instead of marshmallow. Probably one of the most calorific things money can buy, but I couldn't care less - it's divine. I stop off mid-shop for a café con leche and a Havannet with free biscuits - ludicrously expensive with the inflation in this country, but still nice and relaxed and no more expensive than, say, Starbucks.

They have an offer on boxes of Havannets and biscuits if you buy a coffee there, so I buy a couple of cases to take home as Christmas presents and one for the office, which should make me popular over Christmas...

A Long Weekend of Buenos Aires Dining

No sooner have I got settled again in Buenos Aires than my newly-wed couple friends arrive for a 10-day late honeymoon. They are staying with me in Buenos Aires for a few days either side of a trip to Mendoza and a bit of gaucho ranch life, so I set out to show them my favourite dining spots in the capital, plus a few new ones we'll discover together...

Thursday 24 November - Bardot and Soberbia 22 

We kick off at Bardot on Honduras for a pre-dinner cocktail. I've walked past this place many a time with its purple and pink interior and thought it looked like a trendy brothel, but apparently it's a Peruvian-Japanese sushi restaurant. Unfortunately, the restaurant tends to look empty whenever I walk past, so we just sit outside for a cocktail on the street. The Pisco Sour - a cocktail made of pisco liqueur, lemon, angostura and egg white - is simply perfect and refreshing.

Bardot, Honduras - image from http://www.restobardot.com/es/index.html

After the cocktails, we end up at Soberbia 22 because we leave it a bit too late to book and everywhere else is so busy. I really fancy going to Las Cabras on the corner of Fitz Roy and El Salvador, but unfortunately the place is heaving and they can't sit us down until 11pm and my friends - newly arrived from London - are a little too tired for an Argie-late mealtime. So we head to 22, a pretty empty-looking parrilla on Fitz Roy with Guatemala - the only place we can find that's not completely heaving. 

We sit outside on the street and, unfortunately, see a lone cockroach scuttle up the wall right next to our table, but we're not too perturbed since it's not inside the restaurant and it's a hot, hot night - I guess we can't take it out too much on Soberbia 22. The steak is pretty good and my newly arrived travel friends are perfectly happy, so we all go to bed well-fed and well-rested.

Friday 25 November - Cabaña Las Lilas

Friday evening, we head to Cabaña Las Lilas, a famous, touristy steak joint in the popular Puerto Madero port area. I have been here twice before, in 2007 and 2008 - the first time brilliant, the second time disappointing - so am not sure what to expect of it in 2011. One thing's for sure though, the place couldn't fail to disappoint any newcomer to Buenos Aires in terms of its decor and atmosphere - as you walk through from the front entrance of the restaurant on Alicia Moreau de Justo, you can't fail to notice the enormous raw steaks on show in the kitchen, where you can also watch the chefs at work.

A chef at work at Cabana Las Lilas

We barely know where to start with this huge array of steak on offer... Ojo de Bife, Bife de Chorizo, Asado de Tira, or the enormous Bife de Costilla... 

We kick off with the Cabaña Las Lilas house cocktail, consisting of gin, peach pulp and champagne. Then, because we are mad, sun-obsessed English folk, we decide to sit outside on the terrace in the baking evening heat - a decision we later regret.

I've somehow managed to wangle myself a free steak and wine lunch at an Argentine mining company's end-of-year press do, so I can't quite manage another steak and I order the pollo de campo - an absolutely exquisitely grilled free-range chicken, which I cannot fault. The others order steak and are not disappointed in the slightest. The accompaniments are enormous and we're so full we can't quite manage the limoncello and sweet treats that come with our coffees... 

Limoncello at Cabana Las Lilas

I can safely say Cabaña Las Lilas is happily back in my good books. Yes, it is certainly one of the most expensive places to eat in Buenos Aires - as you might expect in one of the most touristy areas - but the food is abundant and can't be faulted, and my guests are well-nourished and delighted.

Saturday 26 November - Osaka Part II

After an afternoon in La Boca, in which we get scammed by a cafe bar that gives us a 50-peso note as change that we only realise is fake when a taxi driver refuses to accept it, the three of us are happy to be back in the comfort and safety of relatively scam-free Palermo Hollywood in time for dinner. I am proud to take my guests to Osaka, and I dare even say the sushi restaurant is even better second time round. We order the usual mix of salmon sashimi, mouth-watering ceviche and a few hot dishes and, of course, the essential Saturday-night pisco sour for good measure.

Sunday 27 November - Olsen and San Telmo Sunday

Lazy Olsen Sunday brunch

We arrive early for brunch at the well-known Scandinavian vodka-bar-come-brunch-spot Olsen (on Gorriti 5870) as I know it's hard to get a table here on Sundays - the place is full by 12:30. The menu is super-simple but it works: think coffee, orange juice and scrambled egg or omelette. We while away a couple of hours in this hip, open-air eatery (though it's a little too early for vodka).

After brunch, we jump in a taxi to San Telmo, the neighbourhood known for its Sunday antique markets, funky gift shops and restaurants. We wind up in an old deli place with a cool interior and ask if we can just order some cheese and bits of ham and salami. The old man on the deli counter looks at us as if we're complete nutters for ordering off-menu, but eventually turns up with an enormous plate of cheese, olives and assorted ham. Seeing our order, a couple at a nearby table asks for the same and, soon enough, we've started a trend and the entire restaurant is chomping away on huge plates of delicatessen items. 

Deli food in San Telmo

Unfortunately, I fail to note the name of the restaurant, so it will just have to be known as the unnamed San Telmo deli...

The unnamed restaurant in San Telmo

Buenos Aires Dining - Grappa Pizza

Having heard Grappa is the best pizza restaurant in Buenos Aires, I'm eager to try it out when an old Argentine girlfriend suggests we meet up. 

So I'm a bit disappointed when the pizza comes up short of my expectations. The restaurant itself is on a beautiful, cobbled street corner - El Salvador with Ángel Carranza - and is perfect for people-watching, but the pizza tastes a bit fried and greasy for my liking. The service is good and I enjoy having a proper, two-hour conversation in Spanish with an actual local - I'm ashamed at how little Spanish I've spoken after almost two months in the Argentine capital. But unfortunately, Grappa is out and Bakano still wins for me in the Buenos Aires pizza stakes.

Grappa

A Weekend in São Paulo

I've hardly been back from Patagonia for long before it's time for a long weekend trip to São Paulo. For work, but fortunately just for the annual Latin America Summer Party - basically a fun jolly on the beach with loads of free food and catching up with my fellow LatAm journos.

It's the first time I've been back to São Paulo (apart from my brief trip through the airport last month) in two years - since the last summer party I went to in December 2009, after leaving my home in Brazil in December 2008. The first thing that hits me when I step off the plane from Buenos Aires is how cold it is. Like, literally, about 15 degrees C colder than Argentina, just a 3-hour flight away, so I'm already starting to feel a bit skeptical about Saturday's party on the beach!

I am staying at the Hilton Morumbi, the hotel that was once my home for about two months in early 2007, so it feels strange to be back, especially since all my bosses and colleagues are now roaming around the same hotel. I head straight out for dinner with a couple of journo colleagues who work in Brazil and then straight to bed after a late night on Thursday, ready for a day in the office on Friday.

On Saturday it's the Summer Party. We get coaches from the office in São Paulo's Brooklin to Guarujá on the South coast of São Paulo - about an hour's drive. The party is at Forte dos Andradas - a private, military beach where, apparently, President Lula likes to spend his holidays! As such, we arrive to machine-gun-laden top military police-style security.

Photo courtesy of Google Images

The rest of the day is spent lounging around drinking Caipirinhas, Caipiroskas and eating delicious barbecued food and sweet treats. There are tons of activities - fencing, football on the beach, kids' face-painting - but I am, quite frankly, happy just to chill (literally - as it's cold and windy) and get gradually merry while I catch up with friends.

I ate at least six of the delicious condensed-milk-and-chocolate brigadeiros you can see at the bottom of this picture

As the evening draws on, it gets colder and we warm up on the beach with a bonfire and a few more cocktails. I can see why Lula likes this place...

Forte dos Andradas, Guarujá

Saturday night, shattered, we take the coach back to São Paulo and go for some late snacks and drinks at the Hilton's Canvas Bar.

Sunday, I have planned to do a little Christmas shopping at my old favourite Shopping Morumbi before meeting friends for lunch, but on arrival at the shopping centre, I realise nothing opens until 2pm. All I want is some Brazilian coffee to take back to a colleague in London, so I'm gutted not even Café do Ponto opens til 2. How's a girl supposed to get a coffee before noon in this place?!

Instead, I while away the time waiting to meet my friends for lunch by sitting outside the coffee shop in the lobby of the shopping centre, admiring this lovely Christmas tree... Merry Christmas to you too, São Paulo!

Shopping Morumbi, São Paulo

San Telmo Dining - Brasserie Petanque

After a quite frankly mind-numbing conference about fertilizers on Tuesday, I am overjoyed to be invited out for dinner that evening with my new BFF Steel Drama Queen (SDQ) and her friend, who is visiting from London and studying a little Spanish while working up a tan that is already 20 times better than my own and she's only been here a couple of days... sigh...

SDQ takes us to one of her faves, Brasserie Petanque, a French restaurant on a quiet street corner (Defensa with México) in San Telmo. Once again, I have no photos of my own, so here's one from the website:

Brasserie Petanque, San Telmo

The restaurant is authentically French and, on SDQ's recommendation, I go for the traditional French onion soup followed by boeuf bourguinon. The food is delicious, the atmosphere refreshingly French, but the best thing about the evening is catching up with my fellow British girls and having some hearty, girlie giggles about pretty much absolute nonsense. It's amazing how much I miss the girlie banter from back home, especially in an office mainly full of men.

Lunching Like a Brit in Buenos Aires

With the Irishman gone, it's back to my solo Buenos Aires life and I'm back at work on Monday, going for sushi lunch at my favourite little café, Green Eat on Reconquista and Uruguay in the Microcentro.

As a Brit in Buenos Aires, I can't tell you how nice it is to have found a normal little café-type place where I can just lunch-and-go, as it were. The custom here is really to sit down over your lunch and have a larger meal, but I can't shake the lifetime habit of popping in for a sandwich or soup and taking it back to my desk. Or, even better in this sunshine city, sitting outside the café to watch the world go by as I eat.

And Green Eat is just perfect for this. The food is healthy and so delicious. Most days I go for the Sushi con Ensaladita - a few bits of fresh salmon nigiri with four sushi rolls and a delicious side salad. Or, if I'm feeling a bit hungrier, I'll go for one of the woks, such as the Soy de Pollo dish with rice and portobello mushrooms, that comes in a cardboard Chinese takeaway noodle box. Delish, especially for a colder day! The salads are also fantastic here. 

Here's a picture of my favourite sushi box from Green Eat's website:

Sushi con Ensaladita - my fave

My only complaint is that, for someone who starts work early and often wants lunch at 12:00, I find the sushi and salads aren't always ready until 12:30 or so. I guess the locals eat later than me, and a few times I've been turned away disappointed. Nevertheless, this place is always chock-full of ex-pats and tourists speaking English and other languages.

And finally... the coffees are pretty damn good too!

Know your coffee at Green Eat!

 

Frank's Bar - The Speakeasy

After our meal at Tô on Saturday night, we ask the French waiter where we should go next. He says there are lots of bars and clubs nearby on Niceto Vega, and in particular somewhere called Frank's Bar, which we've never heard of. He gives very vague directions but we take little notice and set off walking in the general direction of Niceto Vega.

Ten minutes later, we're lost on a dark street with no streetlamps and we're just about ready to head home when we spot a couple of bouncers outside an unmarked doorway on our left. We walk closer and see the tiny sign for Frank's, so we try to walk in, before the bouncer stops us.

"Password?" says the bouncer.

"Ummm..." I say. "I have no idea." (What kind of bar asks for a password?!)

"Did someone invite you here?" he asks, and I'm already thinking we're about to be turned away. Fifteen years worth of being asked for ID at bars in my hometown has taught me never to be ashamed of being refused entry!

"Um, Tô...?" I mutter. 

"Ah, hotel, sí!" he says, mishearing me, and moves out of the way to let us through. Simple as that! 

We walk into a dark room with what I can only describe as a Doctor Who-style telephone booth in front of us, which is the only way out apart from the way we came in.

We look back at the bouncers as we head towards the telephone box and he utters four numbers. These, it turns out, have to be punched into the telephone inside the booth before the door the other side of the booth opens up, letting us into the bar!

On the other side, we find ourselves in a narrow corridor and on the right-hand side we find a sex store, selling vibrators and all manner of kinky items. After a quick peruse, we carry on down the corridor before reaching a large, velvet-lined bar/nightclub set over two floors - the ground floor and mezzanine level. There's an old-fashioned wooden bar with mirrors, oodles of bottles of alcohol and crystal chandeliers. It's quite a discovery we've made!

Photo from gringoinbuenosaires.com - http://www.gringoinbuenosaires.com/secret-bars-buenos-aires-explore-hidden-underground/

The crowd is very young - quite a few kids that seem to be 18-20, but it seems they have another party to go to because, soon after we arrive, they all depart, leaving us with an older 30-something crowd. We order a few traditional cocktails in jam jars and have a dance before heading home.

Teatro Colón and Tô-Sushi

On Saturday night we get dressed up and go to the ballet at the famous and newly refurbished Teatro Colón. At the ripe old age of 29, I have never been to the ballet, and I love it. We are seated way up high up in the theatre and it's a grand experience I'd recommend to anyone. We thoroughly enjoy the ballet and have a glass of champagne at the bar during the interval.

The view from our seats in Teatro Colon

After the ballet, we head to Tô, another sushi restaurant on Costa Rica with Arévalo. Despite having an 11:30pm booking, we are told to wait for a table - it seems they've given ours away - but we get a cocktail while we wait. The place is ultra-trendy with an open bar full of beautiful liquor bottles, behind which the sushi chefs are hard at work. 

The concept of the restaurant is 'Frapanese' - that's French-Japanese, to me and you. There is a young French guy wandering about, but it turns out he is not the owner. 

There are some pretty fancy French-Japanese creations on the menu and we order a big selection. Chef Toufic Reda, from whence the name Tô derives, likes his trio dishes: The Tô Kobe Beef, which includes Kobe beef tartare, Kobe beef 'tataki' and Kobe beef burger, and the Tô tuna, which includes tuna tartare, tuna 'tataki' and seared tuna.

Le Kobe To - Kobe beef tartare, Kobe beef tataki and Kobe beef burger

Le Thon To - red tuna tartare, seared tuna and tuna tataki

I have had Kobe beef in Japan and am expecting it to be absolutely spectacular but I can't say it meets my expectations. It is delicious, but the tartare isn't actually tartare because the melted cheese on top has cooked it, so that is a little disappointing, and the burger is a bit dry. 
 

Langoustine and avocado salad

We also do ourselves over by ordering too-similar dishes, i.e. the tuna tartare with quail's egg, followed by the tuna trio and the steak trio. It is all good, but perhaps a little too much tartare for my liking. (You live and learn...)

Tartare de atun como lo hace Toufic - red tuna tartare with wasabi, 'fake caviar' and the quail's egg yolk

Had I not been to Osaka and Isabel in recent days and had exceedingly high expectations of Argentine sushi, I think I'd have been more impressed with Tô, but the quality of the food just isn't quite as good. That said, the food is more original and creative and the decor is fun - I'd definitely go again. Unfortunately though, after our late seating, we are the only ones still standing at 2am and felt as if we need to leave. On a Saturday night in Buenos Aires, where people often dine at 11pm and beyond, I would have expected the place to be fuller until later.

Trip along the Delta

On Saturday afternoon we pay a trip to Tigre, 35km north of the capital in Buenos Aires province. I went to Tigre on a tourist train called the Tren de la Costa in 2007 the first time I visited Argentina, so we look up how to get there. We find out we can catch a train from Retiro near the Microcentro and change at Mitre before getting the coast train all the way to Delta, so we head to Retiro in a taxi.

Inside the huge and confusing Retiro station, we work out which queue we need to be in and wait before speaking to a ticket officer, who sells us a ticket for 2 pesos - unbelievably cheap. However, there's some problem with the train to Mitre and we can't actually get to the station to board the Tren de la Costa, so we eventually decide to get the train straight to Tigre from Retiro.

Unfortunately, the train suffers huge delays and it takes us two hours in a hot, sweaty carriage with no available seats before we eventually reach Tigre. I am convinced I can find my way to the Puerto de Frutos, the main market area from which all the boats along the Delta depart, but it turns out we've arrived at a different station from the one I came to in 2007 and I get us both lost. When will I learn?!

Half an hour and a trip to the tourist information office later, we arrive at the Puerto de Frutos, which has shops and stalls selling everything from wicker baskets to trinkets and lampshades. There are also coffee shops, cafés and restaurants. It's a scorching hot day and the whole of Tigre is absolutely heaving with people.

We pay for a boat trip with NatVenture and jump into a small vessel with a box of empanadas - small, fried, meat pasties - from a stall for lunch. We spend the next hour and a half travelling up and down the incredible Delta - a network of waterways amid marshland.

I am absolutely amazed by this place! The water is murky but apparently it's clean, as we see families, dogs and children bathing, swimming and frolicking in the Delta, with others sunbathing and picnicking happily on the riverbanks. 

Bathers in the Delta

There are speedboats, houses on stilts, hotels, a school and even colonial mansions on either side of the waterway and you can even stay here for a little holiday break.

A speedboat on the Delta

Our little boat takes us down a narrower waterway surrounded by weeds so that we can witness the wildlife, flora and fauna up close. The trip is a real eye-opener.

We finish up with a piece of brownie cake and a coffee in a little café before finding out way back to Delta station for the Tren de la Costa. The train dumps us at Olivos, where we discover an enormous antique market that only opens on certain days of the week. We have to get a taxi back to Palermo from Olivos and there's a little time to relax before dinner.

I had never been on the Delta before and it's definitely going to be one of my top recommendations for things to do in Buenos Aires!

Buenos Aires Dining: Osaka

On Friday night, after the football debacle, we decide to treat ourselves to some luxury sushi. I've heard Osaka restaurant come highly recommended and we've booked in advance, which is essential. It's a Peruvian-Japanese sushi and ceviche bar and restaurant located on Soler with Fitz Roy, a few blocks from my place. I've walked past it a ton of times but never been in.

We are greeted at the door by the hostess, who immediately compliments me on my dress, thank you very much (brownie points). She notifies us of the restaurant's policy of only accepting cash, Argentine credit cards or Amex, which is good to know because I'm sure most tourists would be carrying none of the above.

Inside the restaurant, it's dark and moody and very trendy. We order a delicious pisco sour at the cocktail bar and ask to be seated upstairs on the terrace. We get a great seat outside in the small private varanda but before long we realise this is also the smoking area and are joined by several smokers around our table. This calms down after an hour or so though and we're left alone.

I didn't take photos, so this one is from Osaka's website. This is the interior deco of the Puerto Madero branch but the Palermo one is very similar

Osaka has an extensive sushi and ceviche menu with hot dishes and salads to boot. We order a big selection of dishes, including salmon sashimi, 'Carpassion tiraditos' - strips of raw fish with passionfruit and honey and lemon marinade, teriyaki balsamic butter-seared beef fillet, and one of the house ceviches. The food is served beautifully on little white pottery spoons and beautiful plates and it's cooked perfectly. The tastes are mouthwateringly divine and the salmon in particular is some of the best I've ever tasted.

The service lets the place down a little bit as our waiter seems to be new and messes up our order a couple of times, but we have a brilliant night drinking cocktails and gorging ourselves on sushi and hot dishes until our hearts are content. It's so wonderful to be able to sit outside on a warm night and enjoy a stunningly good meal. Osaka is definitely my new favourite.

The Unfortunate Football Game Charade

We leave El Calafate and say goodbye to Airport Cat before boarding our 11:15 flight back to Buenos Aires.

On arrival at Jorge Newbery local airport, there's an enormous queue of hundreds of people for a taxi and the traffic is horrendous, so we decide to shun the queues and set off walking to find one on the street. Half an hour of taxi-searching along the Costanera later, we admit defeat and walk back to the airport to join the queue.

Another fifteen minutes later, we're in the back of a cab, sitting in motionless traffic. We ask the driver why so much traffic and he explains there is an Argentina-Bolivia football game at 5pm. Are there still tickets left? we ask. Of course, he replies. It turns out it's a World Cup 2014 qualifier and, all of a sudden, we're desperate to go. It's 3:30pm and we have huge suitcases so we ask him to take us back to my place to drop off our cases before immediately driving us to the River Plate stadium. 

Another 45 minutes later, we're still in the cab, having been stuck in ridiculous traffic for an age. It turns out not only is there a football match on, there's also a massive airline workers strike and we're stuck in the middle of it all. We eventually make it to my flat, run in to dump our bags and run back out again, armed with just a crappy rucksack as we know football matches can be violent in Argentina and we don't want to take much with us.

Another 30 minutes or so later, we arrive at River Plate stadium just before 5pm. We pay the taxi driver with a tip for his efforts and jump out to squeeze through to the ticket windows in the stadium. There are crowds of people everywhere, but once we make it to the ticket window, we are told all the tickets are gone. What can we do to get a ticket? we ask. We've come all this way. The ticket officer just shakes his head at us, so we ask a policeman, who tells us if we go to a nearby football club, we can still buy a ticket. Where is it? we ask. We're told it's about 10 blocks away and are given some very vague directions.

Five minutes later, we're lost as the policeman's directions make no sense - he clearly didn't have a clue. We ask two sets of football fans and they both tell us different things. We set off walking in what we think is the vague direction and eventually come to some football fans who are marching keenly in the same direction, clearly looking for tickets also. The game has already started.

By the time we eventually arrive at the football club, it is almost half time and we're pretty much despairing but still determined to get tickets. We arrive at a tiny ticket window and we're the last in the queue of about ten people. Just as we reach the back, we hear the guys at the front saying the tickets are all sold out. By the time we reach the window to check, there are only 600-peso tickets left. We umm and ahh for about five minutes over whether to spend 85 pounds each on tickets for a football game that is already half-way through. We desperately want to see Argentina play - it could be the only chance for both of us - but we don't even have enough cash in our wallets and they don't take credit cards, so we take it as a sign and walk away, heads bowed. 

We wander trying to find somewhere to eat and end up at a random, grotty football cafe with a load of fat old men, where we stand out like a sore thumb. But we're starving so we order some pasta, which turns out to be disgusting re-heated instant stuff. We've just wasted about 3 hours of our lives trying to see a football match in Argentina and all our plans for the afternoon have gone out the window. Ah well... 

Ice Hiking and Horseback Riding in El Calafate

Day One in El Calafate

I have spent the last month or so planning our Patagonia trip, partly with a tour operator back in Buenos Aires called Chalten Travel. We've organised a full-day excursion to the Perito Moreno Glaciar with a mini ice-hiking trip for the first day, which is what I'm most looking forward to.

The bus sets off for the 80km drive to Los Glaciares National Park, where we cross on a small boat towards the glaciar to take photos. It's one of the most spectacular things we've ever seen. The best bit is the occasional far-off rumble we hear of a piece of ice cracking off the glaciar and the huge splosh it makes when it tumbles into the water.

Perito Moreno

We can see the tips of the icebergs poking out of the water but they often go hundreds of metres below the water level too. 

The boat takes us over to the other side of the lake, where we dump our bags in a hut. Some of the tourists just stop to observe the views, while a group of us sets off for the ice hike. This involves a walk on what I can only describe as the beach, before we stop to put on the huge, heavy crampons.

I can barely walk with the crampons on the sandy dirt surface up to the top of the glaciar, so it's hard to imagine how I'll manage to walk on ice.

Water pool on top of Perito Moreno glaciar

The hike is precarious, to say the least. It's like walking on top of an enormous meringue. Some of the peaks we have to go up and down are near vertical and one slip could result in major injury. As if that isn't enough, there are deep crevices every few metres that lead to huge building-sized drops that could cause certain death. One wrong footing would mean disaster, and I'm actually pretty scared!

There are little pools of glistening, bright blue water every so often and the water drops down for many metres in between the peaks of the meringue. It's all pretty impressive.

After about an hour of hiking, we reach the top and - to my surprise - there's a little table set up with a huge basket of alfajor biscuits and a couple of bottles of whisky! The group of us stops for this unexpected refreshment before hiking back to the beach.

Whisky and alfajores on top of the world

Next, we head back across the water on the boat and the coach takes us to a viewing point where we can see nothing but miles and miles of pure glaciar.

Perito Moreno from the walkways

The views are incredible but I'm freezing cold by this point and don't want to stay out for too long so we take a few snaps from the different points of the walkway and head back to the coach. 

We fill up on juicy Patagonian steak and red wine in the evening before heading to bed.

Day Two in El Calafate

We're both under the weather by this point and the Irishman's back is killing him but we've already paid for a horseriding trip so we decide to go along anyway.

Despite the fact that we've arranged the horseride through a tour operator, we arrive at the little hut at the bottom of the town and the owners seem surprised to see us. Two cowboy types, one who is visibly stoned, invite us in and survey us with amusement. They don't speak English, so I translate to them that the Irishman's back is hurting and he doesn't want to injure it further by horseriding, so he just wants to observe while I horseride. (Note: I actually hate horseriding and am petrified of horses but I paid for this excursion for the Irishman's birthday and I am damned if I let my money go to waste).

The cowboy dude looks the Irishman up and down and tells him in no uncertain terms to "Man up". He hands him some sort of special, anaesthestic, healing balm and gives him no choice but to come out and mount one of the horses.

The cowboy organises for me to have one of the tamer horses and he leaves us with the younger cowboy and off we go. The young cowboy is about 23 and spends the entire two-hour excursion chatting me up. He ignores the Irishman completely because he doesn't speak Spanish, and I am amused by his line of questioning. He thinks I am about 19 (I am in fact 29). A pack of local, feral dogs follows us for the entire trip. 

Eventually we get back to the cowboys' hut and are given mate (strong, bitter Argentine tea) to try. Mate (pronounced MA-tay) looks like weed and is drunk from a little pot with a metal straw. A lady hands the little pot to the Irishman and he takes a couple of sips while I wonder when she's going to give me mine. It turns out mate is a drink to be shared between friends. You take a sip and pass it on. Lovely, since we both now have coughs and colds! The lukewarm liquid is way too strong, like over-stewed green tea, and I'm not a fan, but I'm glad to have tried it.

Thoroughly exhausted after the 25km hike, the shorter hike, the ice hike and now the horseride, we feel like we've earned a rest and we spend the afternoon in a brilliant literary-café-come-Irish pub called Borges y Alvarez Libro-Bar. I have a toastie and we sit for hours writing postcards and drinking dulce de leche-infused hot chocolate and special coffee. 

El Calafate is a very touristy town but the people are friendly. We take a walk to a view point at the end of the town before heading back to the hotel for our last afternoon in Patagonia.

We specifically chose Esplendor El Calafate for the fact that it has a swimming pool and spa area, so I'm somewhat disappointed to discover that it has very strict opening hours and isn't exactly well-equipped. After our long day, we decide to try out the spa and go for a dip in the pool.

The pool is long, thin and shallow so I decide it's perfect to do a few lengths before relaxing in the jacuzzi section. So I'm alarmed when, on the second length, I crack both shins on something extremely hard and sharp. I am in absolute agony - the kind where you scrunch up into a little ball and squeeze your eyes shut to stop from crying. I discover there is a massive concrete step in the middle of the swimming pool, the same colour blue as the water, with unfinished, sharp edges. What the...?! This hotel is supposed to be a feat of interior design and they literally haven't bothered to warn customers about the massive, life-threatening step in the middle of what is supposed to be a swimming pool. Esplendor gets several black marks added to my mental review.

The rest of the spa is terribly disappointing. The 'jacuzzi' is just a bubbly section of the main swimming pool, meaning that the water is cold. The slate floor throughout the whole area is slippy and there are unmarked steps in weird places, making it generally a very hazardous place to be. Both of us slip and nearly break our necks on a number of occasions. God forbid anyone bring their children here. There is also only one tiny changing room and the whole room is cold and therefore not relaxing or spa-like at all. Fair enough, it looks nice, but it's not the best.

Time for a final Patagonian dinner before heading back to Buenos Aires.

Hiking at the End of the World: El Chaltén

Day One in El Chaltén

We wake up at the crack of dawn on Monday and don our thermals, ski jackets and hiking boots after a decent but basic breakfast at Estancia La Quinta. It's a beautiful, clear blue-sky day, cold but warmed by the sun, and we get a lift to the start point so that we can walk all the way back into the town. We're heading to see the spectacular views of Mount Fitz Roy (Cerro Fitz Roy) and Mount Torre (Cerro Torre).

The bridge to nowhere near El Chaltén

Along the way, there are several views of the beautiful peaks of the two mountains, culminating in the most incredible views from the top of a lower peak. 

Cerro Torre and Cerro Fitz Roy

It takes us about five hours to reach this point. The walk is harder than we expected, with lots of uphill climbs, but we make it in several hours to the top of a breathtaking blue lake called Lago de Los Tres, where stop for lunch. As you can see by the photo below, looking down onto the blue lake means being way up high on a mountain, and the lunch stop is freezing cold with biting wind. But the sun is still shining and we eat our packed lunches with glee. Alfredo, the ranch owner, has sneaked a hard-boiled egg into our packs and we're delighted.

Lago de Los Tres

The trek back down the mountain is almost as hard as the hike up it but we know we're on the home strait. Or, at least, we thought we were...

Two hours later, we think we're just about to reach the town when we see this sign to El Chaltén and another that says we're 10km away. 10km!! We have long since run out of food and are exhausted, blistered and starving. I feel like I'm in Into The Wild...

Handy sign

Another two hours later, we reach El Chaltén and collapse, utterly spent and in unbelievable pain. We have walked 25km up and down hills and it has taken us 9 hours. Hungry as we are, we cannot walk an inch further and stop at the very first restaurant we see as we enter the town from the top. It looks toasty warm inside with a fire roaring and, even though there are no customers, we couldn't care less. I see the sign for Patagonian lamb and we're in. We immediately take our boots off, such is the pain, and relax.

Two hours later, we leave, full of lamb and red wine and make the short-ish walk back to Estancia La Quinta. 

Day Two in El Chaltén

We wake up on Tuesday morning aching and sore from head to toe, with stuffy noses and a cold brewing. Both of us are fit and healthy, with me having run a marathon a month ago, but we weren't quite prepared for the hilly 25km hike of yesterday, so day two is about taking it easy. We go for a shorter, two-hour walk and have a simple lunch at a basic and simple place called Fonda Ahonihek in the town.

At 6pm, our coach departs El Chaltén for El Calafate and, on the way, we pass this sign, just to prove that we really are at the end of the earth.

A long way from ... pretty much anywhere!

We arrive at Esplendor El Calafate, which is supposed to be a boutique hotel but is actually part of a larger chain and is a pretty big hotel. The reception staff are pleasant but not exactly friendly, and the restaurant is upmarket but empty. We choose to dine there anyway because it's too late to venture out, but the restaurant is way overpriced and is the kind of place where you feel uncomfortable with waiters standing over you and where you feel obliged to buy expensive bottled water.

That said, the interior design including the reception and rooms is absolutely stunning, with funky touches like antler lampshades and cow-skin stools to sit on. The rooms are very comfy and cosy and the view of the town from the hilltop location is pretty good.